Daily Archives: January 18, 2008

Out of the Mouths of Babes

Neat Things I Didn't Author

A nurse on the pediatric ward, before listening to the little ones chests, would plug the stethoscope into their ears and let them listen to their own hearts. Their eyes would always light up with awe, but she never got a response equal to four-year old David’s comment.

Gently, she tucked the stethoscope into his ears and placed the disk over his heart. “Listen,” she said, “What do you suppose that is?” He drew his eyebrows together in a puzzled line and looked up as if lost in the mystery of the strange tap-tap-tapping deep in his chest.

Then, his face broke out in a wondrous grin and he asked, “Is that Jesus knocking?”

De-evolution and Other Wrongness

Of Vice and Virtue

Oh, my poor maligned character!

I go into my one surgeon’s office, complaining that I am de-evolving into an alligator.  I don’t *actually* believe that, but I am annoyed with this odd skin thing.  I’m on my 4th diagnosis, and they just shrug and say probably some form of eczema and give me steroids for when it gets really bad.  Other leading things I accuse it of being are:

1.  Allergy to winter (since it gets worse when the weather gets cold)

2.  Leprosy (it’s not, so don’t try to kick me out of church!  🙂 )

My doctor says, “Oh, I thought it was a hickey you got from the tool.”  (I probably shouldn’t have introduced him to the term “tool.”)  After my emphatic denial, he says, “That’s what I thought, but I didn’t want to ask.”

Please.  As if I would just go out and do things like that with some random boy!