Lord,

I am going to be talking just to You in this post. Mostly because You are all good and You love me and are probably the only One who would want to be around me right now.

I know that emotions are transient, and that they, in themselves, are not sinful. It’s what we do with them, right? Well, right now, I am so frustrated. I can’t even point out a particular reason for my extreme frustration, but there it is. And everything seems to be making it worse!

I am trying to be kind and to help others. I don’t want to feel this way.

I am trying to work on my homework for Catechism study tonight. At the end of the section we are to read for today’s lesson, it tells us to read and pray with Psalm 139 this week. So I looked up and read it. It was all about how You know our innermost thoughts. So You already know how tempestuous I am inside this morning.

I know it will pass. I also know that any comfort given by others is not likely to be received well by me at the moment. I am just not very receptive. The last thing I want when I feel this way is for people to be kind or understanding. Why is that? Is it because their kindness points out in even sharper relief the fact that I am feeling anything BUT kindness at the moment?

Please give me Your peace. It’s the only thing that can help. And please help me to see others through Your eyes and to love them with Your love, for my own is very insufficient, especially now.

Thank You for listening to me and being here with me, even when I don’t want to be with myself. I love You.

Have you ever stopped to reflect on how you’ve learned words? Certainly, a lot of our knowledge is from our parents and from school, but what about those words that we learned on our own, by reading in context and things like this?

Do we *really* know what they mean? Precisely?

Maybe not. I know there are quite a few words that I only know the meaning of in a general sense. There are probably a lot of words that I’ve only read and never heard, so I’m not certain of the correct way to pronounce them.

Like “banal”. I always thought the emphasis was on the first syllable, which had a long A sound. But, I have heard many people on the radio pronounce it with a short A, and emphasis on the second syllable. And what exactly does it mean?

Merriam-Webster says it means, “lacking originality, freshness,” where I always thought it meant something like, “boring” or “meaningless”.

Maybe I should work harder to look up these words I don’t really know. Instead of tending to skip past them and remaining ignorant. 🙂

Here’s another one: Ineffable = “incapable of being expressed in words; unspeakable; not to be uttered”

Perhaps some day, I’ll master the English language…. Some day a long time from now…. 🙂

God’s most precious gift He could give us is the gift of His only Son, right?

I get that parents usually love their children more than themselves and therefore the gift of an only child would be a greater gift than if you sacrificed yourself for another person.

But on the other hand, it can seem a bit … external.

Good thing for us there is no dichotomy here. Because Jesus *is* God. As the Word of God, He is the incarnate reality of God the Father’s perfect self-image. So, in a way, you can think of it as God — in giving His only Son — is giving everything that He is, holding nothing back. A complete gift of self. To us.

He’s giving us all that He is and all that He holds dear. There is nothing else that could be given above this. And He lays it all before us, and waits to see what our response will be.

One of the first things you learn when you are in training to be a Reactor Operator is Basic Electricity and Electronics, or B-double-E. A solid foundation for the rest that you will learn in order to be successful in your job. In our training program, we have to go over a vast amount of material in a relatively short time. It is much faster-paced and dense than most college curricula. Because of this, there is not enough time to explain the origin of all of the theories and formulas which we employ. To try and diffuse our persistent, “But why?” questions, Chief instituted this simple practice:

The “I Believe” Button

So, there would be concepts that he would introduce, saying, “This is the way it is. You’re going to have to trust me and hit your ‘I Believe’ button, so we can continue.”

In a way, the Church is full of opportunities for us to hit our “I Believe” buttons. The very nature of the Church herself is a mystery. God is a mystery. Sacraments are a mystery. Faith is a mystery. We can understand these things to a degree, but never in totality, due to the infinite nature of God.

Because I have been conditioned by my military training to take some things on faith, I am better disposed to submitting my intellect and my will to the teaching of the Magisterium on matters of faith and morals.

I know that it’s possible to not know exactly how everything works, but trust that I will have enough knowledge to get the job done (or in the case of the Church, be provided with all the knowledge necessary for my salvation and my mission to evangelize others).

It is also a reminder to me to be humble, for there are things which I don’t know, and there are things I will never completely understand and that’s okay. My worth and dignity aren’t based on the knowledge filling my brain, or the sharpness of my intellect, but rather the way I live my life according to the faith.

I am glad that I have had this idea presented to me, so that when confronted with a difficulty, instead of allowing it to present a question in my faith because I don’t have an answer, I can hit my “I Believe” button and be strengthened in my faith. Because I trust in the Holy Spirit which guides the Church according to His Truth.

Brushing Up on the Old, Beginning the New, a photo by Nanny With A Camera on Flickr.

… because Jaibee is learning a new language this semester!

That’s right! This fall, I will be tackling … Latin!

Then, finally, I will be able to read things like: In his quae de necessitate fidei non sunt, licuit sanctis diversimode opinari, sicut et nobis.