Category Archives: Prayer/Prayer Requests

Novena to the Thirteen Blessed Souls

January 22, 2013Prayer/Prayer RequestsCadyLy

A friend asked me to pray this novena for her for the next 13 days. The 13 blessed souls are Jesus and the 12 apostles (I’m assuming Matthew and not Judas for the 12th apostle).

If you’d also like to pray this novena with me, here it is!

(Please Note – The repeat of the first line is not a mistake it is supposed to be read twice.)

Oh my thirteen Blessed souls so wise and understanding, I ask you for the Love of God that my request be answered. Oh my thirteen Blessed souls so wise and understanding, I ask you for the Love of God that my request be answered. Of you I ask for the sake of the blood that Jesus shed that my request be answered.

My Lord Jesus Christ that your protection wrap me with your arms. Guard me with your eyes.

O God of kindness you have been my defender in life and death. I ask that you free me from the difficulties that torment me. My thirteen blessed souls so wise and understanding having received the grace I seek from you [state request] I will be devoted to you.

Say 13 Our Fathers and 13 Hail Marys for 13 consecutive days and offer a Mass of Thanksgiving.

Sacred Space

January 8, 2013Prayer/Prayer RequestsCadyLy

A friend sent me a link to Sacred Space, a prayer site run by Irish Jesuits. On a whim during my lunch today, I popped on and starting praying with their prayers, reflections, and Scripture for today.

The Scripture was the story of the miracle of the loaves and fishes. After reading the passage, they ask you to reflect upon how this Scripture made you feel.

In the beginning, they describe the people as being like sheep without a shepherd. This made me think of myself as a sheep, and how I would feel if I were without my shepherd. And I became sad. I need my shepherds. I would be lost without them.

Then, they spoke of how all the sheep were gathered up and held within the communion symbolized by the loaves and fishes, and I saw in this the analogy of the Mass. It made me reflect upon the profound connection that there is between our priests and the Mass. And upon how much I need both.

I need this sacramental life like I need air to breathe. And I can’t imagine my life now without it.

Thanks be to God.

Epiphany House Blessing

January 6, 2013Prayer/Prayer RequestsCadyLy

I found this tradition in a Catholic bookstore around my first Epiphany (which was in 2008), and have kept it a tradition in my household ever since. Basically, you are taking time on this day to consecrate yourself and your household to God for the year, up to next Epiphany, when you do it again. You can find prayers for this house blessing in several places online, this one is the site that I used tonight to bless my house and to consecrate myself to the Lord.

Since I live alone, I said all the prayers myself, aloud. 🙂

I prayed the Magnificat from the Bible I received from the RCIA program, when I was joining the Catholic Church.

Then I sprinkled holy water in each of the rooms of my house. I don’t really have a good “sprinkling” technique, so I kind of splooshed gobs of water in each room from my holy water bottle. I’m sure God can work with that. 🙂

I didn’t have any incense with which to incense each room in the house. Instead, I took a candle I received at a memorial Mass for my godmother, lit it, and prayed for her intercession in each room in my house. I tried to tailor my prayers to the activities that normally occur in each room (E.g. pray for friends and relationships, that I consume media that feed rather than diminish my soul, etc. when I was in the living room). I asked her to take all these prayers to the throne of the Lord.

As the last part of the house blessing, I inscribed + 20 C + M + B 13+ above the entry doors to my home.

Front Door:

Back Door:

What To Do When You Are Having a Bad Day

August 6, 2012Of Trials Opportunities and Gifts, Prayer/Prayer RequestsCadyLy

1. Think of three things that you are truly grateful for about *today*. Get specific.
2. Think of three things which frustrated you today. Be specific. What was most bothersome, worrisome or annoying?
3. Think of three intentions. Three things which really need prayer. Again, be very specific.
4. Offer each of your frustrations for one of your intentions. Pray that God somehow uses the troubles of your day to bring grace and blessings to these intentions.
5. Give thanks to God for your blessings of today and also for the opportunity to undergo struggle, so that in Him even your frustrations can be efficacious and so you will never forget that you need Him and that He is always there for you.

Amen and God bless!

We Have an Amazing, Personally Involved, God

July 8, 2012Prayer/Prayer Requests, Tales of My Amazing PriestsCadyLy

It’s amazing how God works in people’s lives sometimes…. This is what happened to me after work yesterday. I had a bit of time since I didn’t have to be in Troy until 7 pm for the Fisherman’s Net Charismatic Prayer Group meeting. I knew that my house was going to be sweltering, as I turn off the 2 little window A/C units that I have before going to work, and didn’t want to hang out there. So, I went to one of my favorite after-work hangouts: OLGC! 🙂

I had the double intention of taking some pictures of the baptismal font, as an upcoming theme for my Project 52 group is Water. I spent the first little while sitting on the floor by the font playing with the holy water. Marinating in holy water HAS to be good for you, right? 🙂 And the floor was nice and cool — I loved it.

Next, I took a “video tour” of the upper floor of the church. I’ll see if I can get the video uploaded somewhere soon (sometimes I have an issue with file size, but don’t do enough video work to warrant getting a professional account somewhere). Of course, this started out with taking pictures of everything, as that is what I do. 🙂 And, yes, I took over 100 pictures…. LOL!

I still had about half an hour until I wanted to leave, so I pulled a book out of my backpack and sat back down by the font to read. A little while later a woman walking down the hall asked, “Is there anywhere in this church where you can light a candle?” Since I had seen it on my video tour, I replied, “Yeah, it’s down the hall by the Mary icon,” pointing. I kind of watched while she walked down the hall, and it looked like she was getting lost in the seating area. I called after her, “It’s all the way at the end of the hall!” Then, I got up, hopped over the river of holy water and went over to her.

As I started to walk her down to the mosaic of Mary and Jesus, I noticed that she seemed a little upset. I asked her if there was anything wrong, if there was anything that I could pray for, for her. She started crying and told me that she had lost her house. Not only that, but she was a nurse, currently out of work, and had been staying with a friend until recently. Her friend had told her sister that it wasn’t working out, so she not only felt abandoned — because she was no longer welcome there and had no place to go — but she felt additionally hurt that her friend couldn’t tell this to her directly, but spoke to her sister. She was getting a little disillusioned, starting to question where God was in all this and becoming weary of her burden.

I gave her a hug and asked her if she wanted me to pray with her right there, in front of Mary. She said yes, so I lit a candle for her, and we both knelt down. She asked if I would pray, so I prayed aloud for all of her needs. She wept. She said how happy she was that I was there, that she had asked me a question, and that God had brought the two of us together.

After we prayed, we started to walk back down the hallway. She let me know that she was there to meet with some people from the Knights of Columbus and that they had been putting her up in a local hotel. She said that she had spoken to Fr. John and that he had put her in contact with the Knights. She said that he seemed like a nice man, and that she hadn’t known that he was in charge of the radio station. We talked a little about the radio station and she asked when his show came on. I said I could look it up for her and we walked over to where my phone was.

On the way, she noted that she had given Fr. John 3 Miraculous medals. I stopped and kind of looked at her for a second.

A couple weeks ago, I was feeling particularly bad and had been spending lots of time after work at the church. On one of the days, I ran into Fr. John while I was there. He asked if I had a Miraculous medal. I did not. He said that a woman gave 3 to him and he had been praying about who to give them to.

“He gave one of them to me.” She looked at me, “You’re kidding!” She asked me a little of how I knew him. I didn’t share a lot, but did agree with her that it was good to pray for him, as he tends to keep himself pretty busy. 🙂 I sat down to write down the times that his radio program, “Christ is the Answer,” aired, and she went to get her soda and said she would sit down apart from me, so as not to “bother me” any longer. She didn’t realize that I was writing down the show times for her.

It was about time for me to leave, so I took the paper over to her, where I had written the show times (as well as a personal note for her). She said, “When I see Fr. John next, I’ll have to ask him how he got so lucky to have you in his life!” I grinned and laughed, “You’ll have to ask him EXACTLY LIKE THAT!” Hahaha! 🙂

God is amazing the way He brings people together, isn’t He? 🙂

Please join me in praying for her.

7 Quick Takes: Friday the 13th!

April 13, 20127 Quick Takes Friday, Health and Medicine, Photography, Prayer/Prayer Requests, Tales of My Amazing Priestsbooks, doctor's appointment, Gethsemane, grace, library, photography, prayer, Sticky Notes, writer's blockCadyLy

— 1 —

God’s grace has been enveloping me this week. I am in awe of the gifts that He gives me and the way in which his is protecting me from my own sinful nature and deformed will, so that my heart may be conformed more closely to His. I supposed I shouldn’t be *that* surprised, since I pray for this all the time, but seeing Him answer that prayer is simply amazing!

— 2 —

The most beautiful sight of the week has to have been the sight of my priest praying, prostrate, in front of the empty tabernacle on Holy Thursday evening. I stumbled upon this scene by accident, but it took my breath away. I couldn’t help but think of our Lord in the garden of Gethsemane, praying to the point of sweating blood — for us. To see my priest doing the same thing… What else could I do, but to be one of the apostles? So, I stayed some distance away and prayed (I *didn’t* sleep!). I prayed for him and for our parish, but I also spent quite a bit of time in prayer just to the Father. If he was praying in the place of Jesus, as an alter Christi, then I wanted to unite my prayers to theirs (his and His). I prayed at a bunch of altars of repose that evening, and I participated (as best I could) in many wonderful liturgies and events during Holy Week, but none captured my heart so much as those few quiet minutes of prayer in the garden.

— 3 —

Just a little bit of medical irony this week…. I had my follow-up appointment with my Pulmonary Medicine/Critical Care doctor yesterday. I was tachycardic, my blood pressure (instead of the nice 106/70 that it was last time) was 131/91, and my O2 sats had dropped from 99 to 93 (although the nurse, after trying a couple different fingers, saw it blip up to 95 momentarily and back down to the 93 it had been for about 5 minutes and recorded the 95).

So, even though my numbers were worse, apparently I was “good enough,” because he walked in and said that “healthy people can’t stay,” and told me that if I continued to do as well as I have been, I can stay out of the clinic until NEXT YEAR! 🙂

— 4 —

Hi! My name is Jenn, and I am a book addict. I recognized this truth about myself this morning as I was walking in the dawn light to my parish’s library to return a book. Typically, I run up book fines like crazy, but I am trying very hard, at this library anyway, to return my books on time. Nevermind the fact that I am currently reading something like 40 books. Or that I already have 2 other books checked out from this library, one on loan from the book exchange at work, about 7 checked out from the library at my other parish and several books at my house which I haven’t finished. Nevermind all that. Because when I stepped into the library this morning, aware that I was there not 12 hours previously (and I read 2 books at that time), I had the urge to check out yet another book…

— 5 —

Writer’s Block… Who would have thought that it would happen on a 7 Quick Takes??? I know that a lot of things have happened this week, but when the time comes to put them into a blog post, I end up staring at the computer screen for an uncomfortable period of time. Does this ever happen to you, too?

I have been thinking that it might be helpful to keep some Sticky Notes on me, so that I can write myself a reminder during the week to prepare for Fridays…

— 6 —

Is it odd that in this highly digital age, having several computers and a smartphone, that I am still enamored of Sticky Notes? I have them everywhere in my house, in my books, in my purse… And, even though I have a Kindle, for books which are not purely for pleasure-reading (which is most of the books that I read these days), I prefer to have a physical book in hand. I used to be very anal about keeping my books looking as pristine as possible, but it seems like I have entered the phase in my life where I want to underline or highlight things which strike me and am enjoying the idea of having books which look “lived in.”

— 7 —

Speaking of Addictions…. I also seem to have a love for photography, which is perhaps not surprising to those of you who know me. I used to instruct photography. Probably the most useful Christmas present which I have received lately is a small point-n-shoot digital camera that my parents got me. I had mentioned wanting to get a small camera which I could keep in my purse, so that I always have one on hand.

So, I now have a small, purple Nikon that I take with me everywhere. Granted, it’s a point-n-shoot, with all of the weaknesses of such a camera (which is occasionally frustrating), but the ability to take photos at any time is so awesome! Like yesterday, while I was visiting the parish library, and happened to notice all of the flowers… 🙂 Photos will be coming… As soon as I get home where I can download them! For now, you can see a few I took with my phone (the day before, when I had left my purse in the car… while visiting (again) the parish library… 🙂

For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary!

My Heart is in That Man

March 31, 2012Of Trials Opportunities and Gifts, Prayer/Prayer Requests, VocationCadyLy

It is rather a unique experience for me, but this man, for whom God has given me to pray and care, and by whom God has taught me so much about what it means to love another person (in a non-romantic way), has my heart.

I wrestle with this concept — I really do! On one hand, I keep questioning myself; is there something wrong with me? Is there something disordered here? Because I don’t want that. That would be “of me” and not “of God,” and I don’t want to have any part of something which is not “of God.” For His sake, my sake, and his sake. So, I triply denounce anything which is just my runaway emotions or imaginings.

But…

I don’t think this is disordered. I pray about it all the time. I discern myself and with my spiritual director, priest, and others. I think that it is just a unique way of loving which I am less familiar with, but with which God in increasingly making me familiar.

See, we are all meant to love outside of ourselves. We are all meant to see each other person as the most holy thing you will encounter with your senses outside of the Eucharist — Jesus Himself. We are all meant to pour our entire selves out for other people.

I know that I am an unfinished work, because although I am getting closer to understanding this with this one person, I don’t yet have this kind of love for ALL people. And I should. I really should.

I think it’s a process. Of softening my heart. Perhaps in a way, my heart was hardened. Oh, not in the sense that I was mean or uncaring for other people — that’s never been the case. But I think that I have been hurt before, and so I hide my heart within myself and only share parts of it with others.

For this one man, however, God has done something like take my heart outside of the place where I keep it hidden within me and placed it within him.

If this all sounds rather odd and unpolished, it’s because it is. These are new thoughts, and I’m hashing them all out here for you to see (and me to remember and be able to go back to later). What it comes from is from my experience last night. Whenever I’m around this person, I feel some sort of visceral connection. Like my senses are being tweaked. I’m kind of used to that by now. It helps me, I think, to “tune in.” Does he need more prayer than usual today? Does he seem sad, burdened, joyful? How can I help?

I was at that Called and Gifted workshop last night and he was there also. As I was leaving — driving away — I looked back at the place and the thought came to me (in a way different that my thinking it myself, if that makes any sense), “My heart is in that man.”

Last night, just before bed, I was reading from Peter Kreeft’s book, “Before I Go.” The last thing I read was “What Does ‘I Love You’ Mean?” He replies, “‘I love you’ means ‘I tie myself to you.'” I find this to be so true. I’ve written before about how I think that prayer binds you — in love, in Him — to another person. I think prayer is one of the most loving things you can do for another person. So, as I pray, I am binding myself, and I am loving. And I am finding that my heart is moving outside of me and is residing in others.

This morning, I woke up and continued reading. On the next page, he’s talking about family and another line jumped out at me. “So to give someone your time is to give him your life.”

A true gift of self. I am not my own. I belong to God. May I cooperate and go wherever He leads me, and continually seek after the pieces of my heart which He is placing in others.

Find Joy in Each Day

March 26, 2012Prayer/Prayer Requests, SacramentsCadyLy

Today was our Parish Reconciliation Service. I had tried to go to reconciliation on Friday at Christ the King, but they only have confession for 25 minutes prior to Mass, and there was a long line of people. It got to where I was the very next person to get into the confessional and I was started to really think that I’d get in. Alas, the woman in front of me took a long time and I wasn’t able to go. It’s so disappointing when that happens.

I try very hard to control my emotions, although they want to do things like make a sign right next to the one that says “Confessions will stop 5 minutes prior to Mass” which says, “This means you should confess your sins in number and kind and not try to justify them, for the sake of the people behind you in line who also need to be forgiven of their sins.” It doesn’t take that long to say, “I kicked a puppy three times, smacked my kid brother, was late for Mass every Sunday for the past 3 months and stole a pen from work.” 10 seconds. DONE.

So, I try to give them the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps they haven’t been to Confession in a long time or are extremely shy? Maybe they do have a lot things to confess? Suppose something upsetting happened to them and they need extra counseling from the priest? With all that, you can’t be upset at the other people who were in line.

All of this comes and goes in a second. A moment’s irritation and then I am back to myself again. 🙂 But, it does leave me with the question of where I am going to get to go to Reconciliation. I was too sick on Saturday to do much of anything, and I know that Palm Sunday weekend is rather hit-or-miss for being able to catch confession. So, when I saw that we had the Parish Reconciliation Service, I knew that I had to go then.

I was the second person to see my priest. I was in and out quick (you’re welcome!) and my penance was to say a prayer, either from the liturgy aid or from somewhere else. I gathered my things and went from the church to the chapel, where — delightfully — the Eucharist was out for Adoration. I had looked in the bookshelf before entering the chapel for a book of prayers, but didn’t see any. I was going to grab a Bible and pray one of the psalms, but the Bible I was looking for wasn’t on the shelf. I thought that someone might have left it in the chapel and went in. Alas, no Bible in the pews. I sat down and looked through the things in my bag, looking for a prayer. (Doesn’t one usually search for the *answer* to a prayer?)

I came across my “Bringing Lent Home with Mother Teresa” book and opened to today, Monday of the 5th week of Lent. In the prayer section was, “Dear Lord, help us to find joy in each day no matter what is happening.” This reminded me of this weekend, which was arguably one of the roughest weekends, healthwise, that I have had in a long time.

Saturday started with me waking up screaming in pain from some major muscle cramping. Screaming. It was that bad. After that, I had some muscles in my upper back begin cramping up. They haven’t really subsided, even now. Ouchie. On top of that, I had a headache, dizziness, nausea, and a lot of chest pain. I slept most of the day, only waking up when a friend rang my doorbell for us to go see the play, “Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat,” at the seminary (which was *awesome*).

Sunday, I felt just as bad, except my back and shoulder had hurt so much, I hadn’t slept very well. But, it was a gorgeous and warm day, and I didn’t want to miss out on it, so I got ready for the day, packed up a bag with some books and headed out. I stopped at a friend’s house to see if she wanted to accompany me, but she had to work. I dropped her off and made my way to Cranbrook, where I had a lovely time reading among the various flowering trees. I picked her up from work a couple hours later and we spent some time at Manresa. I still felt pretty bad, but thoroughly enjoyed the beautiful, peaceful day that God had granted me. I was able to see, however, just how poorly I was doing, because even a slow meandering around outside was too much for me.

But, I persevered on. Went to Mass and the RCIA meeting where we had some pizza for dinner. Finally, I collapsed into bed, thankful for the wonderful day and the great people He placed in my life.

I think that joy is both a grace and a choice. God gives me joy, but I also choose to be happy. I choose to focus on the beauty and gifts and grace which I have been given. I choose to not get discouraged over my physical problems. I choose to live as best I can every day, even when the pain is great and the temptation to sleep away my days is lulling me to stay in the house. I choose to offer up my pain in the hope and expectation that God will be able to help someone else because of my cooperation. I choose to accept the joy he offers.

And every day, I get the chance to choose joy again.

How Not to Wake Up

March 24, 2012Health and Medicine, Of Trials Opportunities and Gifts, Prayer/Prayer RequestsCadyLy

I believe there is a right way and a wrong way to wake up.

For example, screaming in pain. This is not the right way.

Unfortunately, this is how I woke up. I had a muscle cramp in my leg so bad, my entire limb was distorted. While screaming and trying to stretch it out — something to make it feel better — my thoughts were of earthquakes as I tried to determine the Richter number of this particular episode. The epicenter of this particular event seemed to be in my ankle and shooting up the lateral side of my calf.

“On fire” does not even begin to describe the feeling. Even through the screamy pain, I did unite my suffering to the cross for a particular person. You are going to have a fantastic day. You’re welcome! 🙂

In further achy news, my chronically tight and painful neck muscles have spread their misery to my surrounding upper back muscles. Way to share, guys.

Soon, it will be close enough to dawn to attempt a walk to the park to stretch these muscles out. Let’s all cheer. Neuromuscular disorder – yay.

Retreat Journal

December 11, 2011Neat Things I Didn't Author, Of Trials Opportunities and Gifts, Penance, Prayer/Prayer RequestsCadyLy

Day One: Friday, December 09, 2011

I come into this retreat experience remembering the disappointment that was last year’s retreat. My expectations were completely different than what actually took place and caused no small amount of frustration. This year, I know basically what to expect, and I know that I can to an extent determine the course of my own retreat experience. Last year, I thought that we were confined to the schedule of the retreat center and was rather annoyed to find out that instead of a restful, quiet, prayerful time, my day was filled from dawn to starlight with conferences. Now, I know that I can skip those and that’s totally okay. Not that the talks might not be valuable in themselves. But for me, I need some time set aside for personal reflection and prayer. I have tons of distractions at home and find it difficult to get anything done there. Here, at least, I have fewer distractions. I hope. 🙂 I know that I have my laptop and my cell phone, but I intend to use my computer for only offline work, and my cell for the Liturgy of the Hours.

What are my goals for this retreat? I suppose first off, I want to get some studying in for my Nature & Mission of the Church final that I have on Tuesday. I know, that doesn’t sound very retreatesque, but I really should study, and it’s about His Church, so it will help me to get closer to God while I read the material, right? I think that’s a valid use of my retreat time. Perhaps I’ll work on that second paper for the class while I am here as well, for much the same reasons. On a personal note, I hope to spend some real time in quiet prayer and reading of the Scriptures. I pulled several books off the shelf from their library and hope to dive into those a bit, too.

What’s happened so far? Well, Mila and I arrived a little before 6 pm and got our room assignments. I spend a few minutes, not really unpacking, but rather putting things in the general area of where I would like them to be and just taking a moment in my room to be alone. I know, not my usual modus operandi, but a good thing, I think. At 6:30 pm, we went in to dinner, and I ended up sitting next to a girl who lives in Rochester Hills and grew up at St. Anastasia (although she doesn’t go there now). We had a good conversation, which ran until the time for our opening conference at 7:30 pm. I have to say, that was *long*. Perhaps not temporally long, but it was tough to sit through all of that. Plus, the little movie (or, well, longish movie) that they had us watch was set to this really sugary, calming music. Probably not the best move to show people after a long day at work at the end of a long work week and right after eating. 🙂 But, I managed to stay awake, although I was tempted to leave and return to my room for a little while.

The message of our time here at the retreat center is “Are We There Yet?” and is attempting to focus us on our lives and the goal of attaining Heaven and how to get there. Okay, decently interesting. I suppose I can reflect on this. 🙂 The only problem came when they started talking about the schedule for the next couple days. See, most of it was fine, until they started explaining about Reconciliation. There are going to be two time periods tomorrow where we can go to the chapel and the priests will be available for individual reconciliation. However, they are also going to have a communal reconciliation on Saturday night, and the priest said explicitly that, “Just come up to me or Fr. P. You don’t have to tell us any sins or say any act of contrition, because we will assume that you have already done this on the way up. Just let us know that you want the sacrament and we will give you sacramental absolution.” Is this even legit? I thought that communal reconciliation was just for cases of emergencies, like war or something. I don’t see how this could be justified when we have recourse to Reconciliation two other times on the same day!

Alright, I’m not going to gain any headway on that matter and now probably isn’t the best time to try and argue about that. Plus, maybe I’m wrong. I really don’t know what the rules are for religious order priests. Perhaps it just rubs me the wrong way and that’s just my issue. No matter. I can just go to Reconciliation the normal way and not worry about the rest. And, hey! I can spend that time that they are going to be using for the communal reconciliation to pray on my own! Win-win! 🙂

Next item that made me want to say Hmmm… The anointing. At the end of the opening conference, they had us all come up to either Fr. P or the female retreat director (or assistant, I’m not sure what her official title is) to get an anointing, which I took to be a kind of blessing for our retreat. And what she said was pretty much that, a blessing. It was good. And it smelled good too! Wait. Too good. Is that…? No… Could it be…? Did they just anoint us all with Holy Chrism?!? Can they do that??

At any rate, I now smell great. We all spent some time in front of the “exposed” Eucharist (the ciborium was out of the tabernacle, yet remained covered). Not sure if that’s different that if He were in the tabernacle or not, but it’s Jesus and the point is that I got to spend some time with Him. I think, too, that my wish that he were out a little more is okay by Him; after all, I just want more of Him… How could He say “No” to that? 😉

And now to start reading the first of my retreat books: “The Little Prince” by Antoine de Saint Exupery. I remember reading this is French class; however, any Christian references were completely lost on my atheist self, so I was quite surprised to see it on the shelf here under Spirituality. I suppose I am about to find out… Wish me luck and that the Holy Spirit may see fit to give me some insight. 🙂 See you on the flip side!

Day Two: Saturday, December 10, 2011

Good Morning! This morning’s schedule looks pretty full already! 🙂 20 minutes until Morning Prayer, breakfast, a conference, a meeting with a spiritual director, reconciliation, Mass, then lunch! 🙂 That’s a lot of eating in just a few hours! 🙂 I’m going to go get clean and put my thoughts in order!

I have to say, I love being in places like this. I love the simplicity of it all. It reminds me of being in the military and staying in hotel rooms. Oddly enough, these are things which I greatly enjoy. And they had my favorite Kashi cereal for breakfast! Yum!

I feel a little guilty by missing their conference. However, in their road trip analogy, some of the talks which they outlined yesterday, I feel that I am comfortable with in my own journey. As I sit here in my room, looking over my book of prayer intentions, I see a line which I had written in the opening page, regarding intercessory prayer, “It is casting our weakness before God’s strength and having a bit of God’s passion burn in us.” This simple sentence speaks to me in so many ways. My priest offers to us to think of the offering of the gifts during Mass to be an opportunity for us to put any of our needs or struggles before the Lord, so then as we pray that the Holy Spirit transform the bread and wine into the body, blood, soul and divinity of Christ, so too will something miraculous happen to those particular items which we will to also be upon that paten. I feel that I am constantly putting things on my paten and offering them to God. “Please, these are the things that I care about. I know you can fix them. Please help!” Mostly they are people. I love people. I love to make people happy. I love to help people. I love to be around people. And I love to pray for people. I suppose this is a good thing, since I am an intercessor, right? The part which talks of a bit of God’s passion burning within me, I feel is that deep care, concern and love that I have for the people for whom I intercede. They may not be people, necessarily, whom I know personally. Or they may be people with whom I have difficulty. But nonetheless, I have love for them in my heart, and concern for their well-being, which I believe is God’s love and passion for His people, which He allows to flow through me for their benefit. The connection between all of us people is as amazing as it is mysterious and I am so grateful for the opportunity to be a part of this. I wouldn’t miss out on it for anything!

I now have about 7 minutes before my meeting with one of the retreat spiritual directors here. I’m not exactly sure what I will say, or what advice to ask for.

…

Oh wow. I don’t even know what to say about that. I have to talk to my spiritual director after that meeting. Much to pray about.

Thank you, Lord, for a beautiful Mass. I am so happy to be allowed to participate in giving Your Precious Blood to others. I pray that they will be open to the graces which You wish to bestow upon them, and that I may also be open to Your grace. Amen.

I love going to Reconciliation. I am always glad to tell the Lord through the priest that I am sorry for offending Him and that I wish for His grace so that I may live a holy life deserving of the gifts which He gives me. This one started off a little humorous:

I was probably the 6^th or 7^th penitent. I entered the confessional and began:

“In the name of the Father, and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen. Bless me, Father, for I have sinned. It has been – ”

“Are you here for Confession?”

“Um, yes?”

“Oh, okay. Go ahead.”

I finished reading “The Little Prince.” It is a cute story. There is much in there that I could relate to Biblical truths, but for now, I think I will simply reflect upon it in my heart for a bit. There is one part that I’d like to share. The little prince relates the story of the fox which he tamed. It is this taming, this relationship, which makes the fox special to the prince and makes the prince special to the fox. He also relates this taming to the relationship that he has with his rose on his small planet. Of this the fox says, “It is the time you have wasted for your rose that makes your rose so important.” This makes me think of two things: first, about how praying for someone, if you do it sincerely, creates a visceral connection between you and that other; and second, about how Father says that “wasting time” with the Lord is the best way to spend your time. I think because it fosters that relationship. Particularly in front of the Blessed Sacrament, are we tamed by Him.

Next, I started working on my paper a bit. Peeked through some notes. Dropped in and stood outside the door to one of the conferences to see what it was that I was missing. Came back, and worked some more on my paper. Spend a bit of time not doing anything in particular, but just sitting back and enjoying the quiet.

I suppose that I’m not too good at being quiet for a long period of time, because at 5 pm, I decided to check out the other conference, although not quite in the way that one might expect. I had discovered on my previous scouting mission that there is a speaker that feeds into the living room area right outside the conference room. So, I could sit out there in a nice, big comfy chair and listen to the talk. Even better, I brought with me Henri Nouwen’s, “Can You Drink the Cup?” So I got to read and listen at the same time. Multitasking at retreat! Score! 🙂 15 minutes until dinner, and it’s supposed to be Annie’s famous pot roast.

Words worth reflecting on from Fr. Nouwen, “Lifting our cup means sharing our life so we can celebrate it. When we truly believe we are called to lay down our lives for our friends, we must dare to take the risk to let others know what we are living,” (59).

Next book read, “The Seven Deadly Sins and Why We Love Them,” by John Steinbacher. The part I like best about this book is that it spoke of the power of prayer, and how patients can be healed or recover faster when their priest is praying for them. I’m sure this is why I have been out of the ER for as long as I have. Thank you! 🙂

After that, “Lessons from the School of Suffering,” by Fr. Jim Willig:

One day, when I thought I was alone, I prayed in church. While making this offering before the cross, a parishioner came up to me, put her arm around my shoulder and prayed, ‘Dear God, please heal Father Jim. And give me his cancer.’ I was incredulous. I looked at her, and then back to the Lord and quietly prayed, ‘If she insists, Lord, hear our prayer!’ Later I was able to pray, ‘Lord, rather than give my cancer to her, give her heart of love to me – the love that prompted her to deny her very self and pray in such a loving way,’ (21).

I pray like this sometimes. If I see someone I care greatly for suffering or sick or in pain, I will often ask that the Lord give that to me instead of to him, if that be His will. Another great quote from Fr. Jim is, “I do not know what my future holds, but I know who holds my future,” (23).

Day Three: Sunday, December 11, 2011

I went to bed about midnight, knowing that I was going to have to get up early in the morning and leave the retreat center prematurely so that I could attend the baptism of my cousin’s daughter, which was scheduled for 8 am.

This morning, I’m feeling very sick. I really just want to curl up in my own bed and just sleep the day away, but I have a lot of things to do. After the baptism, I have to go to the 10:15 am Mass at St. A’s because they are going to read my Mass intention for Fr. Anonymous and I really want to be there for that! 🙂 After Mass is RCIA. Hopefully, I will be able to get back home about 1:30 pm. However, I will still have to study and write my papers, so I won’t be able to crawl into bed just yet.

Lord, please, give me strength!