Dinner of Champions!

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Orville Redenbacher, you have disappointed me. I thought your easy microwaveable treats would make a fine, warm dinner. However, they quickly cooled and was not nearly as tasty as the popcorn I can pay a billion dollars for at the movie theatre. Oh how I wish you would work on your Secret Recipe just a little bit more so that bachelors as myself can have an enjoyable meal on nights when they are too cold to get out to the store, too broke to order a pizza and too lazy to cook using more than one pan.